Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize