based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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