you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
