How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
