If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
