i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
