Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
