why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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