the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
