Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
