Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize