You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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