halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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