After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
