then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
