They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.