You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
