I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
as a side note pls kill me
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