okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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