I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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