she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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