I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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