Non-Jews are for practice
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize