her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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