I have demons in me.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
i out mim tonsoeep
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