loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
