you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Randomize
