Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Randomize
