i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
