$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize