I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
