i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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