: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
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