what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize