Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I want her autograph on my taint
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
