Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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