Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
