You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I would ride that face into the sunset
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
