these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
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She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
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The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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