some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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