So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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