That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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