At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
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