she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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