R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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