If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I think people are normalizing furries
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
