she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
