There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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