I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
