I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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