My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize